You're probably all wondering why I've called this meeting. :-)

Well, a few weeks ago Lady Jo wrote me telling me that she had extra copies (1 of each) of Dragonfly in Amber, Voyager and Drums of Autumn - all hard cover, and all in excellent condition. However, she had a big problem with taking them to a used book store! Hey, I totally agree!!

So, she graciously said she would donate them to the cause and perhaps we could have a contest and give them away as prizes.

So, that's exactly what we're doing - in the form of an essay contest. Put on your creative thinking caps!!!!

Ladies and Laddies of Lallybroch Essay Contest Rules

1. Each entrant must submit an essay of up to 300 words (approximately, we're not counting unless it gets *WAY* over *g*) and the topic is - "Why I Think I Should Win A Book". There are no hard and fast rules other than be your own creative self. There are no specific categories, per se, although the judges will be keeping in mind things like a) funniest essay, b) most pathetic/hosed essay, and c) most charming essay, although these are just guidelines. So, just be yourself, let 'er RIP, and just tell us why YOU think you deserve one of the books! The three winners will each receive one of the books.

2. The contest is open ONLY to those on the Ladies and Laddies of Lallybroch official mailing list. If you have received this message, you are on the list.

3. The contest is being held OFF the LOL board, however the three winning essays will be posted on the LOL board after the judges' final decision has been made.

The Judging

We have a panel of 5 judges - Linda, Scotty, Mercedes, Val and Jo.

All essays are to be forwarded to me at the above e-mail address by Thursday, May 13th, at which time the contest will close.

I will give each essay a number. The NUMBERED essays will then be forwarded to each of the judges. It can't get much more anonymous than that! :-)

I know that *I* am really looking forward to reading all the essays and awaiting the judges' final decisions. I think this is nearly as much fun as the trivia contest!!!!! And I hope everyone else does, too, and joins in on the contest.

Sharpen your wee pencils, ladies and laddies, and - START!!! :-)

Good luck.

Judie

The contest has closed, the judges have made their choices. I would like to thank the judges: Lady Val, Lady Jo, Lady Linda, Lady Mercedes and Laddie Scotty. Well done! And congratulations to the winners. :-)

And the winners are:

Why I Should Win A Book (Formerly titled "Why I Don't Have A Life")

There are quite a few reasons why I should win a book. Well, more than quite a few if you count "boredom because my shower head broke" as a reason . I live in Oregon. Rainy Oregon. Nothing-to-do-but-read Oregon. HAVE PITY ON ME! I am a stay at home mom. For hours each day, my conversations revolve around the words "Don't eat the cat!", "NO!", and the ever popular word, "Poop". The highlight of my day is when I find a dollar's worth of change in the dryer, which means I have therefore won the "Dryer Lottery", and the winnings will be payed to me in installments of 25 cents a week unless the oldest child snags it for tab he has with the %#* ice cream man. In the evenings, the routine changes. My conversations then revolve around the words of "No, you CANNOT have a Tootsie Roll for dinner!", "ACK! Don't throw mashed potatoes at the cat!!" and the ever-wonderful statement from my husband "What, chicken AGAIN??". Then it comes to that time of the evening...that wonderful, relaxing, soothing time. "Bath Time For The Momma!" I run the bath nice and hot, pour in the bubbles, light the candles, and sink to my chin in warmth. You don't know how much I enjoy this time for pampering me ..... all three seconds of it. knock knock "Mom!" ..... silence from me ..........louder knocking "Hey, Mom!!!" ...... still more silence from me ............ HORRENDOUS frenzied knocking "MOM! I really got to go!!!!" I reluctantly get out, wrap a towel around me and open the door. Of course, my first words are, "Why didn't you go BEFORE I came in here??" and we all know what this child says, as he turns his red head and his angelic blue eyes looks at me ..... "I didn't have to go then." *Sigh* sob So you can see why I need a book....ESCAPE!

Shannon

My reasons are simple, plain and true.
For wanting such a prize,
I am a greedy, needy shrew
but never would I lie...

My dog ate my last copy,
or it might have been the fire.
I just can't think clearly,
since I touched that wire

It might have disappeared
during that raid we had last June
seems they took everything
that wasn't nailed to the room

My husband threw it out,
yeah, that was it.
Couldn't handle this Jamie guy,
so I lost it from his fit.

It's ripped, it's squished, it's torn
but I read it anyway
I have to have it handy,
To keep up with the Quotes of the Day

There are probably more deserving souls
though I really can't think who
cause I'm a greedy, needy bi***
and every word was true.....

I NEED a hard cover Gabaldon book and fast!

You've gotta help me! I think if I show them a hardcover book they will ease up a bit. I don't think I can take much more of this. I'm desperate!

This has been going on now for three weeks. They come in through the window late at night. It's weird, too, how they never wake the dh. He just lies there completely unaware.

I seem to actually float out the window into the dark sightless void of the night. When I am able to see again I notice that I am strapped to a table. The light is all fuzzy, but there are these strange looking creatures with little bodies, big heads and large black eyes, hovering about me. They aren't speaking, yet I can hear them asking me questions.

"Are you Claire?" they ask me.

"Huh," is all I can mutter.

They ask again if I am Claire and I just shake my head and say, "The only Claire I know lives in England."

"Where is Jamie?" the smallest one, who looks like it maybe is a female, asks.

"Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ!" I exclaimed. "You haul me out of bed in the middle of the night, float me out the window, scare the s**t out of me (the proof was on the table), to ask me about two characters in a book? Wouldn't you rather know about the latest experiments at the Jet Propulsion Lab, or even about the zipperless leader of our country?"

They shook their heads and the "female" said, "We look into your mind, and while there is not really too much in there, we are fascinated by the very descriptive imagery of Jamie and Claire. We thought that you were Claire since you seem to dream of this Jamie Man."

"Well, I'm not. Can I go home now?" I asked.

"Tell us about Claire and Jamie first." This statement was uttered by a figure that was probably male, but said Jamie's name with what I can only describe as "unutterable tenderness."

"Look," I said, "Just go to a book store and pick up your own copies. I want to go home."

"No!" the little one exclaimed. "You tell us."

So I told them about Jamie and Claire. Needless to say they were enthralled. They listened with rapt attention to every word I spoke. They sighed, cried and laughed in all the right places. My memories of the books were not enough for them however, so they took my paperback copies and tried to read them. They had no trouble reading the cover of the books, but as soon as they tried to open a book to actually begin the story, they became quite frustrated. Their fingers were too large, too few in number and too uncoordinated to hold a book and turn the pages at the same time. With their frustration mounting, they made me hold the book and read to them.

Well, It's been three weeks, now. I'm afraid they will never leave me alone. But I have been thinking (it's hard you see, because I don't have much to think with) and I believe that If I could give them a hard cover copy of a book, then they would be able to lay the book down flat. It would stay open by itself. I think the creatures would need me no longer if they could manage to turn the pages by themselves.

So please have mercy, and spare me any more of this. I'm afraid to go back there again. Last night I saw one of them sipping gasoline from a hose while he spoke of the Great White North.

Please help me.

A Letter to William Fraser, a Gentleman of Virginia, from his Wife, Margaret.

Thursday, May 8 1788

My Dearest Husband,

Stepmama and your Father left today. I was sorry to see them go so soon, but your Father had pressing businesses in the Ridge, that could not be postponed.

Your son is in the best of health, looking more like you each day that passes. Your Father gave him a dog. I came home, yesterday afternoon, to find the two of them standing in the middle of the parlour, their identical Fraser eyes watching me cautiously. John was hugging the filthiest ball of fur I had ever seen, and your Father just stated, "A lad should have a dog, aye?" Thus the matter was settled to his satisfaction.

I enclose a list of the things I need. I do not expect you to remember more than half of them, but I'll be most severely disappointed should you forget John's soldiers and my books. Having heard nothing but praises about Ms. Gabaldon's writings, I'm eagerly anticipating their reading.

I most assuredly deserve them, as you'll be satisfied that I've been a paragon of respectability in your absence. Not once did I argue with your dear Grandmama. And I even attended one of Mrs. H. reunions without disgracing us by swearing, or venting my singular opinions on the education of Women.

Should the assurance of my utmost propriety fail to ensure your diligence over this matter, I will further remind you that the reading of books such as Ms. Gabaldon's novels are reputed to be, never fails to inspire me into those displays of wifely gratitude, as will make your homecoming a most pleasant and entertaining occasion.

Good-bye, my Dearest Husband. You are in the daily and hourly prayers of Your Affectionate Wife,

Margaret Fraser